I'm giving myself a few more days before I return to my regular blogging schedule. My heart is broken, and I find myself more tender to all of life's joys and sorrows.
Ryan and I are walking to bakeries at 9:00 at night, we're steaming artichokes and reading some of our favorite authors.
We are also crying. Crying a lot.
Crying on our kitchen floor. Crying while driving down an abandoned city street. Crying after watching a seemingly innocuous episode of the Office and hearing the name, Pam, repeated again and again.
Having to see 4 family members in the ICU within the course of one year is exhausting. The pain of losing Pam and Jeremy reopens the wounds we incurred when we lost Ryan's father, when we watched baby Ryan struggle for his life.
I find myself asking, "How much more can we bear?"
And yet...here we are...at the end of the day...together. We are surrounded by friends and family, bolstered by love, and trusting that one day, all things will be made new.
Sweet Gwen from Bunkycooks has provided this beautiful guest post. Don't these muffins sound amazing? Gwen produces one of the best food blogs in the country...no exaggeration...and I'm truly honored to have her here.
You all have showered me with love and support. So despite this tragedy, I still feel like a woman supremely blessed.
The recipe for these muffins is from a cookbook that a neighbor told us about. We share many baked goods and new dishes that we have tried between our homes. The Secrets of the Jewish Baker is a delightful cookbook that is full of beautiful breads and comforting baked goods.
I decided to make these muffins because I have a freezer full of berries that we picked last Summer just begging to be used before the season is here again. By the way, they are so good when frozen...I couldn't stop popping them as snack
We really enjoyed these (my neighbor did as well). The muffins have the perfect combination of something savory and sweet. The fresh fruit adds the perfect touch of sweetness without a lot of sugar. They are chock full of blueberries, so there is a burst of fruit in every bite.
Recipe Courtesy of Secrets of a Jewish Baker, George Greenstein
Makes 9 to 12 muffins
1 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
1 cup cornmeal, preferably stone-ground
1/3 cup sugar
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
6 tablespoons shortening, butter, or margarine, softened (I used butter)
1 egg, beaten
1 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 cups blueberries, fresh or frozen
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. In a large bowl, combine the flour, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder, and salt.
Cut in or rub in the shortening until the mixture resembles coarse meal. Add the egg and buttermilk and mix only until incorporated. Dredge the blueberries in a little flour and fold into the batter. Drop into greased or buttered muffin tins, filling each cup two-thirds full. (I greased my baking tin with butter.)
Bake until browned and the center springs back when gently pressed with the fingers, 15 to 20 minutes (mine took about 22 minutes).
* I let my muffins cool slightly in the pan and then removed them to finish cooling on a wire rack.